Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
