their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
honey bunches of taint.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize
