the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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