there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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