Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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