are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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