Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
