i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
