He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
You pole danced in your parka.
The uberlube is also flammable
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
