Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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