The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
