Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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