good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Also, beer. Big fan.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Randomize
