I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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