I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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