I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize