I wanna bring you to show and tell
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
