Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
