your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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