im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I think i got beer on your cat.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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