But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize