how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Randomize
