well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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