i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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