therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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