i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
This beer is not sobering me up at all
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
