Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
