I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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