I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
