dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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