a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize