Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
My feet surprised me
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
