yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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