hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
