I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize