I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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