Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize