David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
