anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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