she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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