Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
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