I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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