Yo dont text me then not text me
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
