Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize
