I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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