hotel room ftw
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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