she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize