Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
