I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
