Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
