his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
